(Last Place in the) Hot Sauce Competition

from by Dyslexic Fudgicle

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  • Cassette + Digital Album

    We recorded a whole album, and only made 15 cassettes of it. Only our friends have heard it, and none of them are really sure what to make of it. Handmade art and packaging by us.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Soundtrack to Your Coma via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 14 days
    edition of 15 

      $10 USD

     

lyrics

Ugh!
Disgruntled chefs of the world,
Your ship has just come in.
You lost the hot sauce competition,
But fear not;
I have a recipe that will allow you to ex(tr)act revenge!
We will connect your grill to an active volcano
And we will pipeline in lava to your hot wings -
And when your first opponent takes that first bite,
His esophagus will melt, and he will have no choice
But to declare you the winner of the hot sauce competition!
(Because the sauce was so hot it melts the esophagus.)
And just in case anyone thinks they're competition,
I have a secret recipe to reactivate Mt. St. Helens
And we will destroy the throats of everyone;
Every chef that stands in our way!
And soon the world will see that you are the chef that risen from obscurity.
Ooh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Ooh!
Oh!
Oh!
BaaaaAAAaaa
NyaAAhhh

So you think you're a chef, and you think you got the goods,
Well, bend over fucker, 'cause I'm in the woods!
That's what happens when you come up with a rhyme on the spot;
But I'll still cook in the woods!
I'll light my grill up in the forest and I'll cook the hottest hot sauce you've ever seen!
I may have forgot to bring any meat, so you won't get any actual food,
But I'll still shove the hot sauce down your throat, and you will die again!
Ahahaha
Ahahaha
Ahahaha
Whew!

What's the matter, hot sauce got your feet?
You went to the dance club just so you look normal when you bounce all over the place?
Just tell people you're on ecstasy, they'll understand.
Beat Beat Beat Beat
Beat Beat Beat Beat
Beat Beat Beat Beat
Beat Beat Beat Beat
Beat Beat Beat Beat
Beat Beat Beat Beat
Beat Beat Beat Beat
Beat
Attack!
Thou shalt die.

credits

from Soundtrack to Your Coma, released April 20, 2016
Music: Nickelsack, Yanni DiNingwie Thunder
Lyrics: G. Burgermeister
Performed by: G. Burgermeister, Nickelsack, Yanni DiNingwie Thunder
Additional percussion performed by: Ben Smith

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about

Dyslexic Fudgicle Providence, Rhode Island

Officially formed in 2003 (although their roots allegedly date back to the Civil War), Dyslexic Fudgicle plays offbeat metal and rock songs about oatmeal, hookers, midgets, owls, and former Baltimore Ravens cheerleader/WWE Diva, Stacy Keibler. They have a reputation for their live shows which involve fast food being hurled into the audience. ... more

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